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HIDDEN FIRES I am a native New Yorker, and I love the charm of New York City. It is the "City That Never Sleeps", and so it's a place where you can go out to get a hamburger at two in the morning. Manhattan is the heart of New York, and it's a heart that constantly beats with it's own special excitement such as no other city I have ever visited, and believe me, I have visited quite a few. But as much as I am in tune with the city, this past summer I discovered another place nearby with which I was very in tune, -- Fire Island. Fire Island is not like any other island I have been to, and believe me, I have been to quite a few. It is an utterly charming strip of sand bacon on an early crisp morning. All the sweet taste without any of the cholesterol. It is intoxicating and exotic. It has invaded every dream I have had since I have returned. The ocean air is sweet and clear. There are no cars, busses, subways or trains, and that is because there are no real streets. The main transportation are found in the banks of little pull wagons and bare feet. The smaller walking paths are primarily raised wooden decking. The cottages themselves are a practice in casual architectural art. And all are suspended above the face of the land so that the island itself can breathe. Wild grasses, birds and deer live in harmony, intermingling with the human element. Its breath is a quarter mile and its length is only accessible by beach or water taxi. Which means that each community is an island unto itself. In some of those havens, clothing on their beach is optional and the brown athletic bodies are as copious as the many shells that grace its shores. In short, Fire Island, some seven miles south of Long Island, and running parallel to it, is a kind of Brigadoon that only appears in late spring and disappears to heal itself of human occupation a few weekends after Labor Day. My friend Frank has a friend who owns a house in the Fire Island town of Seaview, a rather middle class family community which boasts of no real business area and no real center. Apparently, every August, the friend lets Frank use the house. This summer, Frank invited me out for a weekend. You can take a five minute walk from the West End of Seaview, where we were staying, to the town of Ocean Beach where you can shop for knickknacks and ice cream. You can also see a late run movie if you are willing to put up with uncomfortable old wooden seats. But in Seaview, the deer run wild like in an old fashioned Disney movie. There isn't much to do there except relax, have a great dinner at one of the many Ocean Beach restaurants which serve some of the best sea food, bike ride the country roads, and lie around the beach, giving yourself a sexy tan. Of course, being a summer retreat, Fire Island draws the very young and beautiful whose bodies radiate health and vitality. And I couldn't help noticing that the men are as good looking as the women. On a Friday afternoon, late, Frank and I are lying on the beach, drinking beers and looking at the local color, tightly packed inside their bathing suits, and we are sighing. At least I am. The sky is clear blue, the sand is just the right silicone white, the ocean is a picture of blue and white foam. The people are alive! Life is great! Frank looks over at me and says, "Hey Joe, so this is your first time on Fire Island?" Yes, I nod. "I've heard about it, of course. Many people in America have heard of Fire Island." |
| "What have you heard
about it?", Frank asks. "Well", I say, "It has a colorful reputation as far
as I know. Supposedly it's very bohemian and flamboyant." Frank laughs. "Aw Joe. Come on. Look around you here. Do you see anything that's particularly bohemian? Or flamboyant, for that matter?" I laugh. "Well, I see a lot of couples and lots of children." "That's right!", Frank exclaims. He smiles at me. "Not very bohemian, is it?" "Well no", I have to admit. "So", he asks, "What do you suppose people mean when they say that this island is 'bohemian'?" I blush a little. "Oh ok. People say that Fire Island is a 'gay' island. But to tell the truth, I can't figure out what they mean. No one here looks particularly gay to me." Frank smiles again. "Well tell me, Joe. What does a gay person look like?" "Oh you know what I mean", I say. "Kind of .... well you know ... fem?" Frank bursts out laughing. "Oh yeah! Flaming swish queens! Right?" "Hey look, Frank. I don't mean to be offensive. I mean, really, how many people do I know?" "I don't know, Joe", he says. "How many do you know without knowing you know them"? "I'm not sure what you mean", I say defensively. "Well let me put it this way. Many time, maybe most times, when people say that gays are fem, I think what they mean is that gay men are uninhibitedly sexy. And just because this society is led to believe that only women can be uninhibitedly sexy, people have to call gay men fem or sissy." I raise my eyebrow, wondering where he is going with this. But I don't want to appear to be impolite so I just nod noncommittally. Frank takes a swig of beer and continues. "Look, I happen to know many gay men who are as masculine as you or I. Oh I do admit that there are gay men who may appear feminine, but I think that that is just a matter of style. What lies beneath the surface of that so-called femininity is raw sexiness." I take a drink from my own beer can and look at the sea. I don't really know what to say in this conversation. Maybe I'm not supposed to say anything. I've never heard Frank talk this way. But then again, I've never been with him in an environment where I've seen him so relaxed and laid back. He gestures with his hand. "Look around you, Joe. Look at these young men in their bathing suits with their great bodies. Don't you sense a certain guardedness about their body language?" I shrug. "Not sure what you mean." "Oh all right", he says. "What I mean is that no one around here looks flamboyant." He laughs again. "Well tell me, Frank", I say. "Where is all this leading?" "Oh well", he says. "I just thought that in case you wanted to see the flamboyant and bohemian part of Fire Island, I'd show it to you." "Ah", I say. "You mean the Fire Island that is not Seaview or Ocean Beach." "Yes", he says. "I'd really like to take you there tomorrow. We can spend the day there and have lunch, and then at night we can dinner at one of the restaurant-bars there. It's all very exciting. And guess what? If you like, we can go to the beach there and get naked." "Really?", I ask. Frank has got my curiosity up. "That sounds like fun. Sure let's go. It'll be something to share with my office buddies. Quiet little me on a Fire Island adventure!" Frank throws back his head and laughs. "Yes, I am sure it will be." The next day, a little past noon, we grab a water taxi and head out to the community of Cherry Grove, where the FAMOUS Fire Island is. On the way out, Frank is giving me a five-minute history of Gay Fire Island. "Back in the early part of the 20th century, before the StoneWall revolution, when homosexuals had no real voice and had to live sham lives, this place where we are going attracted a fair sized number of gay people, and by the 1950s, you could be gay and openly so. It's because this place was so out of the closet that the whole island got the rep of being gay. I'm sure that the straight folks didn't much care for the reputation that gays were giving it but you know what, the franchised always have to bitch and moan when the disenfranchised stand up and say, Fuck you! This is me! I'm here!" I nod to be polite. I'm not in a mood for social or political activism speeches. As the water taxis hurries out west to Cherry Grove, I just let Frank do the talking. There is a certain excitement that I am feeling in the pit of my tummy and I'm not sure what it is but I want to concentrate on it and not be distracted by small talk. The taxi gets to Cherry Grove and we step out - into a completely new world, - a different Fire Island from that of Seaview. The whole feeling - the ambience - is electric. You can feel it in the air. People are more - well - laid back. Frank is right. The guys are carrying themselves in a very easygoing, kind of - yeah - sexy way. I find myself fascinated. |
| Frank taps me on the
arm. "Hey! You look somewhat entranced. See all these groovy looking dudes?" "Well 'groovy' is not a word I would ordinarily use when it comes to other guys. "Interesting' is more like it", I say. "Well 'fascinating' *I* say!", Frank smiles at me. We walk a little and Frank guides me to a restaurant that he knows; we're going to have some lunch. Frank appears to know his way around here. "Been here a lot?", I ask. "Yeah", he says as he peruses the menu. He doesn't say anything else and I am kind of embarrassed to ask him about his knowledge of the place. We order our meals. We eat mostly in silence and I notice that Frank is giving the eye to a lot of the men there. And some of them nod to him as they make eye contact. I take it Frank has friends or acquaintances here. We finish lunch and Frank takes me on to the beach. It's the weekend so it's pretty crowded with lots of attractive young men and women. There appear to be lots of couples. People seem to be having lots of fun; it's somehow different from the beach at Seaview; somehow more animated. And yes - some guys are stark naked! I sit with Frank on the beach and my eyes are riveted to the scene around me. I feel a tingling in my body that is a new sensation. I don't know what it is but something inside of me wants me to go with the flow. Next thing I know Frank is shedding his bathing suit. Wow! I never knew what his most private area looked like but I see that he is rather well endowed. I notice that several other guys are checking him out as he stands there looking like some tanned Greek god in the sunshine! I cannot tell you what is going on inside me but I can tell you that my heart is racing and I can feel a smile, not only on my face, but one that reaches way down inside me! This is so damn new to me. Something about what Frank calls uninhibited sexiness. It's dizzying. Its liberating! I find myself standing up and reaching down to pull my own bathing suit off. "Hey!", Frank says to me. "I always figured you for a pretty modest kind of guy!" I smile at him. "Well you know what? I always did too!" I laugh. "This feels - I don't know - just the natural thing to do!" Frank takes me by the hand and pulls me along. "Into the water!", he says. We hit the ocean at full stride. Neither the coolness or the breaking waves stop us or slow us down. In a minute, we are swimming along in the blue Atlantic. When we stop to tread water, I notice that I have a raging hardon! Later that night, we are having dinner at one of the restaurant bars that Frank is familiar with. The food is excellent, the drinks hit the spot. The music is contemporary and guys are dancing with each other. To me, it's sur-real, and I think, wow, maybe this is what Frank means when he sometime talks about the magic of this island. Suddenly Frank takes me by the hand. He smiles and says, "Hey come on, Joe! Let's dance!" I am taken aback. I have never danced with another guy. I am at a loss for words. But Frank is kind of insistent, tugging on my arm and smiling. "Come on, for God's sake. Don't be embarrassed, Joe." I get up and follow him to the dance floor thinking, Well he has been here before and knows people here. This dancing with guys is probably no big deal to him and I don't want to spoil the fun we are having by making it a big deal. We're out on the floor and Frank says, "Want to lead or follow?" I shake my head. "I don't care. Well, maybe I will lead." The music is progressive and so there is really not that much contact between us. But then the next piece that comes on is a slow dance. Frank puts his arms around me and pulls me close to him. "Hey!", I say. "That doesn't feel comfortable. I don't want to do this. Let's sit down." I walk back to the table and Frank follows. "Sorry", he says with that disarming smile. "I don't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I just happen to like that song. It always makes me feel like dancing - slow - with someone I like." "Yeah", I say, "but with some girl, not with me." Frank doesn't answer but he looks at me and raises an eyebrow. Then he says, "Joe, why don't we finish and get the check. My treat - No, don't argue! I insist. Then we can take a stroll on the beach. It's nice at night, and we can talk." "Alright", I say. "Then thanks for dinner." Frank pays the check and we walk out. The beach is pretty at night. Although the moon is not out there is sufficient light to see where we are going. The surf is making a great whooshing sound and a slight breeze is blowing, but it's a warm night. We walk a little and find ourselves in a deserted spot. Frank sits down on the sand and motions me to sit next to him. I sit down and look out at the waves. "Look Joe", he says. "I never told you this about myself but the truth of the matter is that I feel very much at home here. I like being around guys a lot and I just wanted to share this experience with you because I've always liked being around you. Now I know you probably think that you don't really belong here but then how come you have seemed so excited ever since we got here?" "Well I really can't tell you", I say. "It's just something about the place that makes me feel - well - alive! But that doesn't mean that I want to take my clothes off and just jump in the sack with some guy!" |
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"No, not some guy", he says, and
takes my hand in his, caressing my fingers and then kissing them. "Not SOME
guy", he repeats as he moves close to me and looks intently into my eyes. I
don't know what's coming over me but I am starting to breathe hard and I am
swallowing hard. He puts his hands on my face and whispers, "God, you look
so delicious. I just have to taste you." |
| When we are
completely naked, he says to me, "Let me love you!" I take him into my
embrace and kiss his mouth and his neck and shoulders, and find myself
loving him with my mouth all over his suddenly sweet tasting flesh. I move
down to his crotch and feel him moving down to mine. Then, my cock is
bulging in his mouth and his is in mine and we are sucking each other and
feeling deliriously sexy in an uninhibited way. Not only does his flesh feel
good in my throat but the sounds we are making as we suck are driving me
crazy. I never knew how good it could feel to have a man's cock in my mouth
and now I feel like I don't ever want to let his cock out of my mouth. So we suck and suck and suck each other till the burning passion and desire mount up. We roll over on our sides so we can buck and thrust into each other's mouths. Our hands are on each other's asses, pushing each other deep in. I hear Frank moaning and I hear myself moaning and the beautiful sounds coming out of us both are leading up to a crescendo. I know that the hot milky white cum will be leaving our balls any second now and we are going to be ----- "OH JESUS! CUMING! CUMING! OH GOD, FRANK! FUCK MY MOUTH, BABY! AND I'LL FUCK YOURS!" I feel my cock squirting into his mouth as my own mouth fills up with his sweet delicious cum! We hold on to each other's cock with closed mouths till every drop is drained out of each other. Then I feel our muscles start to relax. We lay there, in each other's mouths for a few minutes more. Later, we are lying on the beach in each other's arms. Frank is stroking my hair and my face. "Know how this Island got it's name?", he asks. "No, I don't. Tell me.", I say. "Well", he says, "Long before there were light-houses on this island, ships had to be warned away from the rocks here. So the local people used to build huge barn fires. From the distance, it looked like the whole island was on fire." I look up at him and smile. "Well baby, tonight it sure was." |
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